Sunday, December 14, 2008

Being Clear ~ Being Peace ~ Being Present

Jimmy Piver's new blog, "Here to Be Clear," is a gift to all of us. In it, he shares his life while applying his understanding of Ho'oponopono, Eckhart Tolle, Byron Katie, and more.

Recently he posted about dealing with his own emotions during his wife's suffering and trip to the Emergency Room. Ho'oponopono holds that whatever we experience on the "outside" is also in us -- a huge difference from our usual perceptions, which say that problems are "out there", not within.

It's very hard to remain present with someone's pain.

Jimmy did help his wife get the medical care she needed. But he also used Ho'oponopono cleaning tools such as mentally saying "I love you", "Peace of I", "Thank you," and "Ice Blue" (said to be especially helpful for painful situations). They were able to return home a few hours later, and his wife was resting well the next morning.

Did Ho'oponopono "do" that, or did the doctors? Perhaps Something in Jimmy's wife clicked in? I have no idea.

I do know from personal experience that detaching from my reactions to others -- simply observing instead of plunging ahead blindly -- makes a huge difference in what happens next.

I can make a mess, or I can stand back a moment and breathe. My usual automatic reactions include wanting to "fix" it for the other person, in order that they not suffer and I can feel like I'm doing a good job. I have been raised from childhood to respond this way, and to feel guilty when I do not. My medical training honed this still further.

Actions or statements fueled by my own personal, messy needs may be very vigorous and dramatic, but will not serve the person I want to "help".

What Dr. Ihaleakala Hew Len has said numerous times about helping others is very interesting.

He says that when we humans try to "help" or "do" for others in an unconscious way (ie, without doing our cleaning first), we're interfering with God's process of solving problems. We know nothing about what's going on, yet act like we know more than God. Wouldn't it make more sense to get ourselves out of the way so that God -- who DOES know -- can come through?

This doesn't mean doing nothing, though. In fact this might be the best preparation possible for "doing" anything. As Dr. Hew Len shared on a conference call with Mabel Katz earlier this year:

"I'm not saying it's bad to help people, but . . . we get burned because when you take on a client, you're not just taking on that client, you're taking on the client's entire family, relatives and ancestors back to the beginning of creation. So if you're not looking and letting go and cleaning in yourself, you're going to get burned. You're going to get burned to the max. The way not to get burned is to do your cleaning. To let go, cut your ties so that instead of you giving any help then help will come directly from Inspiration. Our job is to let go and let God. If we don't let go and let God, we're going to get burned. It's just the way it works."

So this becoming "clear" that Jimmy and Dr. Hew Len talk about allows Divinity's inspiration to come through without being impeded by our "stuff" (maybe what Eckhart Tolle calls "ego"). Then what we "do" is more likely to be real service. We need to be at "Zero" first, before this can happen.

It also means that in every moment, our first task is to take care of ourselves through our cleaning. As Mabel Katz says, "If we want to help people . . . the best help, the best gift we can give them is really to clean. To take 100% responsibility and like Ihaleakala said, whatever gets erased from us will have to be erased from them."

I've known surgeons who pray before operating on patients. As a medical student I would be nervous in the OR, worried about making a mistake or getting in the way. (Even then, my wanting to be perfect showed up -- as irrelevant to the situation as it was!)

Just before starting, the surgeon would stop a moment and ask God to guide his hands and vision, inspire his mind, and keep the team working together smoothly. Perhaps this happened because I went to a Baptist medical school (Bowman Gray, part of Wake Forest University in Winston-Salem NC) but it always impressed and calmed me. Only much later did I recognize it as an act of self-care as well as supporting the patient.

I'm even more grateful now. There's an old joke that strikes home for me:

What's the difference between a doctor and God?
God doesn't think He's a doctor. :-)

Maybe that one's good for any of us to remember, the next time we feel driven to "help."

Peace Begins with Me,
Pam

1 comment:

South Africa - Ho'oponopono said...

Hi Pam,
Thanks for the great article.
Regards,
Saul Maraney
Johannesburg, South Africa
www.whatishooponopono.com