Finding Peace Amidst the War of Self-Destruction

Sometimes despite our best intentions and Ho'oponopono cleaning, outer situations don't change. In fact they may even seem to deteriorate.

This can be extremely frustrating, leading us to think that nothing we do -- including Ho'oponopono -- "works." Maybe we expect that if we clean (or share our supposed wisdom), others will do as we think they should do. When they don't, we get agitated.

There's a precious balance between doing what we realistically can in support of others, and expecting them to follow our suggestions. It can be hard to maintain this balance.

A situation in my family has been causing great pain, and I've been asked for my thoughts. I've been cleaning, and sharing when it seems right. But for the most part, my words fall on deaf ears. The question is recovery from alcoholism, a condition which eventually leads to death.

My upset is a complex blend of concern, love, indignation, fear, anger, and incredulity that others don't see things the way I do. There's also humor in finding such attitudes alive in me! I'm working on releasing this, using many Ho'oponopono cleaning tools in the process.

Homeopath Bill Mann in Escondido CA shared some profound thoughts about this kind of pain the other day:

"I believe so many of us are in a profound struggle, so many of us are suffering terribly. Sometimes all we can do is allow and let. Sometimes it is beyond where any of our own intervention can make a difference. Sometimes it seems the best medicine for others is your own ability to find peace and quiet.

I have witnessed so much madness and insanity in families, that nothing surprises any more. When alcohol is part of the mix---it seems disaster is at the door. Most cannot come to grips with the demons within---to ask one to confront such, knowing even for sure it is the right thing, just cannot be coerced.

The war of self destruction and spirit of life are always in interplay---sometimes the urge to destroy overrides all else.

How do we find peace inside of ourselves??? That is the true quest--and a worthy effort."

With this, Bill hit things square on the head. Remembering this ongoing dance between the spirit of life and the war of self-destruction is huge for me. It is like the choice we have any moment: to clean or to engage with the "problem".

I see that I don't know what another's spirit has decided and is bringing to fruition, or what God has in mind either. I can do what I am guided to do, yet realize that the outcome is not in my hands.

For me, practicing Ho'oponopono is one way to find this peace that Bill talks about. My homeopathic remedy is helping too! For others, mindfulness or still other kinds of meditation may be workable paths. It is all a work in progress, never complete.

I am reminded of the closing prayer in Ho'oponopono, available online and in many other publications:

Peace be with you, All my Peace,

The Peace that is "I,"

The Peace that is "I am."

The Peace for always, now and forever and evermore.

My Peace "I" give to you,

My Peace "I" leave with you,

Not the world's Peace, but only my Peace,
The Peace of "I".

I can't describe what I'm seeking through Ho'oponopono cleaning -- or even homeopathic treatment -- any better than that. Thank you, Bill, for your clear observations and truth.

Be well,

Peace Begins with Me


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